Am I the only one who's a complete emotional WRECK today?
The events of the last several months- everything to do with this election and politics etc, have really taken their toll on me. I'm an emotional basket case! I really had no idea I would react the way I have to the outcomes of yesterday. I guess I had some suppressed feelings I wasn't admitting to or something. I also had very little sleep last night.
By 7:00 am this morning there was no more hot water for my shower. Why, you ask? Because, for the second night in a row Annabelle has woken up in a pile of barf! She was really fussy throughout the night and after getting up with her at 2 o'clock and 4 o'clock already, at 6 o'clock when she fussed again, I sent James in- who was about to wake up anyway. I smelled the yuckiness as soon as he opened her bedroom door. We bathed her and James showered too, so by the time she was taken care of and I was ready to wash away the barfy smell, there was no hot water.
So that only added to the
"weirdness" I was feeling today. I don't know what else to call it. Lately I've felt like all of a sudden I don't recognize the America I thought I lived in. As much as I know that being politically aware and involved is important, I also think that being ignorant has its benefits! Now when I'm walking at the park and pass a stranger, I wonder, "are they a Democrat? Did they vote to save the chickens but against requiring a minor to inform her parents before getting an abortion?" I can't help but wonder where this nation is headed when I hear all this rhetoric about the "poor cows and hens" but that a 13 year old shouldn't have to tell anyone that she snuck over to some dumpy clinic to have the "oops" of last month taken care of.
I have been somewhat involved in the effort to support proposition 8 here as well. Never in my whole life have I been so scorned or flipped off or yelled at with hateful words than the last few weeks. If these people could see into my heart, they would know that my position on this issue is well informed and 100% hate and prejudice free. Just because the measure passed, doesn't mean that this awfulness is over, either. Today I had the overwhelming feeling that this is the beginning of the beginning.
As for the presidential outcome, I really thought that I would be less affected by it. I respect Barack Obama and think that he
will do what he thinks is best for this nation. But, when I saw the defeated look on John McCain's face and others with him, I burst into tears. Over the last 5 1/2 years, James and I feel like we have really gotten to know him. We respect him and his wife and feel like they are hard working true and proud Americans and that Senator McCain really has what it takes to run this great country. I just had no idea that I was so emotionally attached to the idea of him as the commander in chief.
All that being said, it was one of the most beautiful days that I've seen since moving to California. It rained for only the second time in 6 months yesterday. I was drenched by the time I got to my voting booth after waiting in line in the rain for 20 minutes! Today it was cool and fresh and sunny. It was great. That helped my weird emotional situation, I think.